4 Costumes, 1 Trick, and 1 Treat

I love Halloween.

A LOT.

I love dressing up in costumes. 

Hipsters

Yard Gnomes

Coneheads

I love candy.

I love seeing little kids in costumes, punny costumes, retro costumes, pet costumes, group costumes- you name it. 

Max as a Bunny

I get an added Halloween bonus...I get to celebrate MULTIPLE times. You see, although I teach high school students, 3 hours a day I also run a "preschool" for my child development classes. We do a costume parade every year. Not only do I get to see all their cute costumes (which are SOOOO cute), I ALSO get an excuse to wear an extra costume each year. 

But what about THIS year-

My pregnancy isn't quite Halloween ideal. My bump isn't noticeable enough to base a costume around, but it is "bumpy" enough to pretty much write off any sort of attractive costume.  So, I committed to being more funny than cute for all of my costumes. Yes, ALL of my costumes. 

1- Lizzie's birthday. Rico came up with the idea of going as Uncle Rico- seems logical, right? I bumped that idea up about 1,000 notches by getting my parents to be other Napoleon Dynamite characters. Rico grew out his hair and facial hair so he could have a sweet 'stache. My dad even shaved his beard for the first time in my entire life. 

Uncle Rico, Deb, Napoleon, and Pedro

2- My Preschool costume...I had a hard time deciding between these two

But a pipe didn't seem very preschool appropriate- so I saved this outfit for passing out candy.

and finally...

3- A happenstance costume. My friend let me try on part of her costume before leaving school

The Trick? 

Well, the art department jumped out at me (in the middle of class) and made me scream so loudly that the secretary all the way up in the front office came out to see if everything was ok. My throat still hurts. I told them that they owed me a treat- and I demanded raspberries. 

"Are those even in season?"

"No- so they'll be super expensive. That's what you get"

I got a giant carton. 

All is forgiven.

The Treat? 

Well, I hope you like bump pictures- because that's my treat for you

Gender Guessing

Top 3 Quetions I Get Asked: 

#1- How are you feeling? 

A: Awesome, the second trimester is amazing

#2- Do you know the gender yet? 

A: No, or you would

#3- Do you want a boy or a girl? 

A: We always said we wanted a girl- like, always. Recently though, we've realized a few things- 

All CLEARLY super important and not trivial or superficial in ANY way:

     a. newsboy caps, sunglasses, suspenders, cardigans, and onsies with bow-ties are freaking adorable (ok- I'VE realized this)

     b. having the second grandchild is not nearly as exciting as having the first (and our baby is the second on BOTH sides), so it might be fun to have the first boy on both sides. 

     c. little baby girls turn into emotional (and expensive) teenagers. Erik learned this firsthand from his first chaperoning experience with me to Nashville. It was VERY eye opening.

     d. our nieces are super cute. Like- REALLY cute. I just don't want to put my child through the pressure of living up to all that. 

I know there are lots of supersticions, so let's indulge in those for a bit, shall we?

Baking soda test: it fizzed- boy.

This is gross, I realize that. I told you- I lack boundaries and filters. 

Conception date (closeness to ovulation date)- If my charting is right, then boy. 

If you base it on an average cycle- girl. 

Chinese calendar- girl

Food cravings- salty, not sweet- boy

Necklace test-girl

Heart rate (over 140 says girl, under says boy). Our heart rate as of tonight......140. 

Erik's reaction, as soon as the midwife left the room after telling us was to say, "Well, it looks like we're having a hermaphrodite. That's ok, we'll love them the same and then let them choose." I started telling him that some parents actually choose for them when they are little so they can have a gender identity growing up and that there are some benefits to reconstructive surgery early on. The midwife walked back in and said, "Surgery- what are you guys talking about now?"

"Just if our baby was a hermaphrodite"

Poor lady. Earlier she had walked in on us talking about if pregnant women carried babies in their backs instead of bellies or if they could birth through their mouths by unhinging their jaws like snakes.

Man, we really know how to make a good first impression. 

I have no real boy vs. girl hunch. 

Sometimes I slip and call her a girl. 

Sometimes I find myself naturally calling him a boy. 

There you have it...no mysteries solved today. 

Baby Borrowers

This is the weekend we have been waiting for- the weekend that we got to babysit our niece Lizzie. Rico was VERY excited- maybe more than I was. You see, when we go "back home" we often have SO many family members to see that sometimes we have to split up. Usually this means that I get to have some Aunt Alli time with Lizzie, and he just gets to watch the videos of whatever super cute things she did. He always misses out. 

Well- NOT this time. 

The cuteness began even before our true babysitting began, as she got to know the house while her mom and dad got ready for a wedding. Here she is exploring the dog door. 

Then...the REAL Adventures in Babysitting Began:

Lizzie fell asleep within 30 seconds of us getting in the car to drive her back to our home- which is good because we were so flustered and excited that we were headed the wrong way through a 1 way parking garage. 

My bad babe, my bad.

Let's keep it real here, we were fake parents for less than 1 minute before we were bickering in the car at each other. It was pretty hilarious. Don't worry, it ended as soon as we escaped the evil parking garage. We spent the rest of the night laughing at ourselves and Lizzie- even through "the time which shall not be named" (but a time which you shall get a play by play of)

Rico realized about 10 minutes into the drive home that there was a mirror where he could see Lizzie. "How in the world do parents EVER focus on driving?!" he asked every time he glanced back to awww at her. It's a valid question- one which would be proved to a WHOLE new level in the next hours.

We went home and got ready to take Lizzie on a walk. A "quick change of clothes and grabbing the dog and a jacket" proved to be a 15 minute ordeal. I don't think I have to explain this to anyone who has kids. Rico decided that there needed to be an invention where there was a mirror in the stroller, because it didn't seem fair that we couldn't watch her cuteness at every possible second of the day. 

FYI: We are obsessed with our niece- in case you hadn't figured that out yet.

We stopped at the clubhouse to swing. 

Please note the difference in a gentle, boring aunt Alli swing: 

and a (shall we say robust?) uncle Rico swing. 

Clearly his swings were WAAAY more fun. 

We came home and thought we might make "a quick trip" to the grocery store to return the Redbox, grab some Guinness for Chiefs tailgating the next day, and pick up some ingredients to make dinner. That's when it happened. 

THAT IS WHEN WE WERE BEATEN. 

DEFEATED.

LOST, WITHOUT HOPE.

What could have possibly gotten the best of us? 

Baby meltdown? 

NO! (Well, not yet)

The CAR SEAT.

"We'll just put her in the car seat and go"

HA!

When we had taken her OUT of the car seat when we got home, Rico had pulled on the strap to show me how cool it is that "When you pull on this tab here, it just adjusts to fit baby."(a new trick he had learned visiting his first time daddy friend and his adorable new baby girl on Friday.) 

The problem was that now we had straps tight enough that a doll wouldn't fit into the car seat, much less our chunky little nearly 1 year old niece. The more we pulled, the worse it became. 

Oh. No. 

We fussed. 

We hemmed. 

We hawed. 

We sighed, and took more than a few moments to scratch our heads and laugh at the fact that an inanimate object made for children was stumping 2 college graduates- 1 with a dual major and the other with a master's degree.

The straps would NOT loosen. In fact, by this time they were as tight as they could be to the car seat.

I sat in the front seat with Lizzie while uncle Rico tried to solve the problem for a sold 10 minutes. 

We switched and I tried to fix it. Lizzie was about out of distractions fun games to play in the front seat (which include pretending to put on chapstick and playing the cups in the cup holders like drums)

We tried calling my mom- no answer. 

We tried calling his brother- no answer. 

THIS CAN'T BE THAT HARD! 

It's just a car seat, right?!

Finally, I went inside. It was dark and I was cold. We then followed the sage advice his brother had given him just a week before, "When in doubt- google it." 

There was a hidden button. VERY hidden might I add. 

35 minutes after planning to leave (I kid you not), we were finally able to put her in the car seat. We weren't done being beaten by the car seat yet- oh no! We put her in. We tightened her up. And then it started. 

The screaming. 

Well, last time she fell asleep as soon as we turned the car on- so we both glanced up at each other and read each other's minds, "Get this car in MOTION". We JUMPED into the front seat to get the car rolling. 

It was of NO help. 

The screaming continued. 

The. Entire. Way. To. The. Store. 

Mind you, the store is MAYBE 4 minutes from our house, but I am pretty sure that Rico aged 3 years in those 4 minutes. Frazzled is the best way to explain how he acted at the store. Once she was out, she was her angel self again- but he was having flashbacks. 

You could see the terror in his eyes. 

He may have been shaking.

We walked through the store half looking for things to make for dinner and half trying to recover from the last 4 minutes. We needed a time out to get our brains back. Finally, after wandering aimlessly with our half focused brains we decided we would just go around the strip mall corner to grab Chinese takeout. 

I looked at him and said, "I think I might just walk with her over there rather than put her back in the car seat."

He stared at me. He didn't blink. He just said- "Oh, you thought I was even CONSIDERING putting her back in to go over there? No way. Get to walking!" 

I laughed...and got to stepping. 

She was great as we waited for our food- but we all knew she HAD to go back in to the car seat. 

As we put her back in, she started the crying again. A man walking from the back part of the parking lot jokingly yelled, "Get that girl a crab Rangoon!" 

Thank you stranger, we needed another person who thought this was as entertaining as we did- ok as entertaining as I thought we were. I even considered taking a picture- but I didn't think Rico would appreciate that or see it as in any way a contribution to the team effort. Rico was still trapped in wide-eyed survival mode. I rode in back with her and she quieted down quickly. Ahhhhhh. 

The rest of the night was glorious. Seriously. If the car ride was hell, than we had turned it all around and arrived in babysitting heaven. You see, we have a secret weapon (besides the adorableness that is our niece.) His name: Maximus. 

Max is, apparently, the most fascinating creature in the entire world. Any babysitting success we had should really go to him and Rico. I was so proud of Max. 

We have been VERY curious to see how he would interact with children- more specifically, children on HIS turf. 

You see, he HATES having his paws touched. Lizzie stumbled upon this, and quickly made it her mission to do it as much as possible. 

Here's 1 of the MANY play sessions they had throughout the night- ending in her pulling his jowls nearly off his face (check out Rico's reaction)

We literally never even opened the toy bag. Not once. 

A few diaper changes, 4 trips climbing the stairs, 1 bottle, a few "air-Rico" flights around the house, 1 pajama change, and a lot of baby-giggling later, we tried to calm her down for bed. Every time she seemed to be tired, I would start to lean back with her and she would immediately see what I was up to and POP up. 

Uncle Rico to the rescue again. He seemed to just know what to do. He made the room so calm that even I fell asleep on the opposite couch-and woke up to maybe the sweetest thing that I have ever seen in our living room chair...

What a great night. 

What a great baby to get to play pretend with.

 Thanks for letting us be baby borrowers.

The Bump Goes Public

Parent teacher conferences...two 13 hour days in a row. Every year I dread it, and then every year I walk out the door physically tired- but with a very full "teacher heart" 

Parent teacher conferences win #1-

Some students are brave enough to tell you how much they like your class or how they've shared the information they learned from your class with other people, but most the time you just hope you're making an impact. 

Parent teacher night changes all of that. You hear things like, 

"I usually only go to meet with the core teachers- but I just HAD to meet you! I think my daughter wants to BE you."

 or, 

"I can't tell you how much he/she talks about your class. I've even learned a lot!" Then they tell you what thier child said and it could be a DIRECT quote from class and you think, "THEY WERE LISTENING!"

or 

"I think this class should be REQUIRED for all students to graduate."

or

"They are struggling in all these other classes, but I think you've helped them find their passion!" 

I mean, come on, that doesn't get old. 

Parent teacher conference win #2- 

We get an HOUR lunch AND dinner. This is unheard of. We usually get 20 minutes. I wasn't even sure what to do with myself! Our newest FACS teacher and I even went for a walk around the building- AND SAW THE SUN! You see, we have no windows and I'm often at school from before the sun comes up until after it has gone down. My friend even brought us Unforked one night! Don't worry: I tore up a fish taco, some SUPER tasty kale, and their new tabouli salad. I may have split a giant cookie too...don't judge me. 

Parent teacher conference win #3-

 Getting caught up on all the random other things that come along with my job. Training videos and quizes, lesson plans, blockouts, copies, enhancing lessons that need a little magic, running the Baby Think It Over Reports, testing the babies that failed to see if they were broken or just poorly parented, putting together work for homebound students, arranging places for my child development students to do preschool observations, grading their lesson plans for our preschool,  entering and printing grades for 6 hours worth of kids....you get it. I may complain that people don't value my classes like a core class, but on these nights- I zip it. 

Parent teacher conference win #4- Little Rufio made his presence known! No, I still don't feel him.
Sidenote:  I've taken to referring to Rufio as a him.
Little one, if you end up being a girl, I am sorry I did that. You will think everything I do is annoying at some point anyway, so you can just add this to the list
Back on track: My bump, according to me, is officially a bump. It has moments of less-bumpiness and moments of more-bumpiness, but I see a bump dang-it! 

Rico and I have been watching it grow over the past 2 weeks, but we see me a little more "raw" than the outside world does, so seeing the bump in normal clothes was pretty exciting. 

I'm ignoring the fact that only 1 person mentioned being able to see it, and that I had to tell everyone else that it was out.

(Clearly I HAD to. I couldn't just be a normal person and walk around not making people stare uncomfortably at my barely-pregnant belly. Nah.)

I know, I cropped my head out. You forget, it was a 13 hour day- nobody wants to see that. You came for the belly anyway!

I always imagined that my first bump picture would be well planned out, with a special background, fresh hair and make-up, and good lighting...you know, an event. I did NOT imagine that it would be me stopping before we were heading up to bed saying, "Hey, grab my phone and take a picture of this bump really quick." as Rico sat on our stairs and the dog did circles on the landing wanting us to "just come to bed already!" 

I still hope to avoid the pregnancy in the mirror with my cellphone selfie....but that's just me being bratty. I'm sure I'll get knocked off that high horse by reality sooner rather than later. 

Womb-ventures

Our little one may only be the size of an avocado (as of today- how very exciting), but this baby has already checked off so many baby bucket list items!

It accompanied me to my first "First Friday"

It wrote a master's capstone and will walk across stage in November.

I turned in my portfolio on the same day the President came to visit campus. This lil' guy was all dressed up for the event. When I saw him I cried, and then texted Rico, who joked that I should take a picture of him. Done and done. 

It went to a rock concert and was witness to some poor decision making...and really bad music.

This man kept his hand here for 23 minutes. TWENTY THREE minutes. 

It has been to Starlight Theatre to see the Little Mermaid, and thanks to all those lovely hormones it passed along to me- there was a lot of crying involved.

It was in a homecoming parade and rode a float! 

It went to a bachelorette party and played a few "bachelorette minute to in-it" games- go blue team. There was a lot of spinning...especially considering my increased blood flow. 

It went to a gender reveal for one of my best friends from high school. We guessed right- BOY!

It was in the stands to cheer on its dad and uncle at an alumni game (I'm sure it was waving its little arm buds. Go ahead, take a moment, just imagine that.)

It went to City Market, where it (again) experienced a hunger-rush like no other while hunting for something called a Pierogi (that we later found out was no longer there). In a food-panic- this was our breakfast:

Carollos sandwiches. This was Rico's- mine was far more pregnancy- friendly. 

It went to back to school meetings, meet the teacher night, mentor meetings, AND helped teach the first day of school....and every day since then. 

It visited its aunt, uncle, and cousin. This is what an early first trimester "pool party" looks like. 

It went to the Irish Festival at Crown Center.

And accidentally parked WAAY over at Union Station- which turned out to be a bonus because we got to see not only the Real Pirates exhibit- but some very interesting people at a wrestling event. 

Green fountains!

It went to Louisburg Cider Mill before a day of winery hopping. It was a perfect plan- start with a freshly made apple-spice doughnut, and pick up a 4-pack of non-alcoholic ciders for mom to drink during the rest of the winery tours. 

It went on tours of 3 of Louisburg's wineries. Want to see someone instantly judge your husband? Beg him to go on a winery tour with you and then don't take the samples (and clearly tell them why, because you can't stop telling random strangers because they are the only people it IS safe to tell). They will then look at him like, "You evil, evil man. WHY would you subject your poor wife to this?"   Some may even be bold enough to actually say, "Well, aren't you an understanding wife!" Don't worry, you'll both laugh at it as you sit on the patio and listen to some live music as he drains the bottle you just bought...SOMEONE had to drink my share. It was a phenomenal weekend. 

Oktoberfest. This ended VERY differently from last year. LAST year, I went with Rico and some friends. We stayed at a local bar until 2 am. One of my friends sprinted down the empty streets screaming, "I'm shutting it DOOOOWN!". THIS year, I waited too long to eat (I didn't think about how there wouldn't be preggo friendly street food), and eventually ate a salad that made me so sick we had to leave. 

I got old. 

I got old FAST. 

The Secret it OUT

I am an open book. If you ask me, I will tell you. If you don't ask me- I will probably still tell you.

Here's a perfect example:

At a staff meeting last year, a guidance counselor I don't know very well and I were making small talk. He politly asked, "So, when can we expect the babies?" Without thinking it was an odd question, I went on to explain how our 5 year plan had turned into a 6 year plan- on and on. Finally, another teacher stopped me and said, "Alli, I think he means the electronic babies that the kids take home."

Oh, right. That makes more sense. Sorry for the overshare. 

So, this whole NOT going up on our roof and shouting "We're pregnant!" has been really hard for me. Really, really hard. I find myself telling random strangers- like the sandwhich artist at Subway, or the checkout boy at the grocery store. I have to have some release. I had to straight up LIE to my students, who ALL want to know if and when I plan to get pregnant 

(understandably, I mean they have a parenting teacher who isn't even a parent.) 

So, I lied. 

I lied, I lied, I lied. 

To my students, my family, my friends, and my co-workers. Yes, all these people actually asked me. 

Since we basically knew we were pregnant from afew days after we conceived, it felt like we had been keeping this secret FOREVER. Now, I know, I could have just told everyone earlier, but I didn't want to have to come back and un-tell everyone if something went wrong. That would break my heart. So we descided to wait until our 11 week appointment, where we got to hear little Ruffio's heartbeat. (Did I cry? No. We did EXACTLY what we did when we saw the positive pregnancy test and what we did when we saw Ruffio in his 7 week sonogram- we smiled like the Cheshire cat and stared at eachother, smiled and stared, smiled and stared.)

As a reminder. I. Love. Events.

On valentines day, it isn't good enough that we go to dinner, I want to make it a progressive dessert only dinner.

On vacation one year, I instituted a "Taste the Rainbow Challenge" where I had to drink my way through the colors of the rainbow- 1 color each day. I even coordinated my swinmsuits and outfits.

One of my first notes, as captured by TJ Studios

Rico knows of my love of events. He knows that this is the best way to make me feel loved. Throughout our wedding day, he scheduled with the people I love the most to deliver specific love notes he'd written to me, all the way up until the last one that his mom delivered before I walked down the aisle. He had passed them out secretly to each note-giver at the rehearsal dinner, with specific instructions about when to deliver them.

The last note, just before going down the aisle. Captured by TJ Studios

Each one had been written to go along with what I was doing at that time of day (which he clearly knew because I had made a detailed excel spreadsheet outlining the events of the day in 15 minute intervals.) I know, he rocks.

The point is, I love events and themes. So, I couldn't just very well walk up to people and say, "Hey, by the way, I'm pregnant."

Oh HECK NO!

I had a plan. I was going to get as many on video as I posibly could, and then use those to make my "facebook official" announcement.

It didn't go perfectly. As much as my husband "gets" my love of events, he also just wanted to tell everyone he saw, so waiting to do it in person just so I could film it was not his favorite idea in the world.

I even got a text one day from him saying, "I can't stop telling people- I just told the tech guy! We've got to get this video out!"

So, now, it is OUT:

And the secret keeping is over! When we know a gender- you will. 

(after a fun gender reveal event, obviously)

Once we know a name- you will. 

No. More. Secrets. 

Textbook Pregnancy....Well, Almost

Everything about my pregnancy has been textbook- except the almost month long spotting. The first week I wasn't worried- in fact, that would have been pretty textbook itself. When the spotting continued, Rico and I had to accept the fact that we could be losing the baby. Again, we are realists. We know the odds. We know that these things happen- even when you DO make every effort to prepare your body to get pregnant. We felt trapped, not knowing if I was pregnant or if I had miscarried. So, we did 2 things

1- Called the midwives (who set us up with an early 7 week ultrasound)

2- Decided we better name this lil' thing a nickname that was a "fighter's" name. We went through lots of names lying in bed one night. Then, Rico said it. "What about Ruffio? As in "Ruf-fi-oooooo!"
Ruffio is from the movie Hook (one of our FAVORITE childhood movies- we still watch it if it comes on tv.)  I laughed so hard I cried. I couldn't get myself back together again. Perfect. Ruffio it was. That became our secret code. If I was having a bad day, Rico would send me quotes from the movie. Every time I had a pregnancy symptom, we would crow like roosters (this makes sense to you if you are awesome and have seen Hook.) It has been a perfect name so far....you know, minus it being super masculine and not gender neutral in any way. At all. I mean, come on, look at him:

We went to the ultrasound appointment. We checked in and chatted about our day, feeling like we were playing grown ups again. The lady at the check in stopped me as we were giving her our information:
Front desk lady: "Are you guys parents?"
Me: "Well...we HOPE so. That's what we are here for." (Patting my tummy)
Lady, checking my chart: "Oh gosh, I hadn't even looked at WHY you were here. I just thought that you two seemed like you would be such fun parents! Well goodness, I hope your appointment goes well".
She was clearly flustered at this point, I think she thought that she had done something wrong- but that was EXACTLY what we needed at that moment.

So, we were called back and we got all prepared for the sonogram with a far more stoic ultrasound tech. Up came some images, and then she just casually said, "Well, the heartbeat is beating at ...."
I interrupted her- "Wait, so it's in the right place AND it has a heartbeat?!" I'm not sure that she realized that we were working WAAAAY back at that level. We both smiled....again, a lot of smiling and staring, staring and smiling. Our baby had made us gawking idiots for a second time. She showed us some things, and measured little Ruffio. I knew what I was seeing, so I kept checking to make sure Rico knew what HE was seeing.
At one point, I went all FACS teacher on her. "Wait, stop, is that its yolk sac?"  (It was- but gosh, I was a little bossy about it!)
She told us that Ruffio was measuring at 7 weeks and 4 days (EXACTLY what we had thought, literally to the day- clearly we had another rule follower on our hands- just like mom and dad.)
She printed our first baby pictures, and we started heading home- still smiling like idiots.

As we went down the hall, the lady from the front desk popped out and asked how it went (as if she couldn't tell from the smiles and complete fascination with the pictures in our hands.) I jumped up and down and said, "We're going to be parents!" She gave me a hug and said, "Oh, I am so happy! I got all the girls back here together and we all prayed for you two- that you would get good news!"

Oh. My. Gosh. 

So. Sweet. 

I melted. IN the hallway of the ultrasound office. 

People are awesome. Little babies with tiny tails in grainy pictures are awesome. Rico is awesome. This is awesome.

If I am not Pregnant...I am SUPER Crazy

Morning Sickness- 

Yep,  at 3 VERY specific times of day. At one point I had to lock my class out of the room and turn out the lights to pretend that I just hadn't gotten to class yet (so I could run to the bathroom and dry heave a little).

Emotional-

Ohhhhh yeah. There was one moment, where my pregnancy brain had led me to mis-calculate and charge a woman less for something than I meant to. Erik pointed it out to me (very nicely), and I almost lost it on him. Then, it was as if I returned from an out of body experience. I shook my head and just said, "Whoa, I'm sorry, I'm not sure where that came from". He smiled, laughed, and said: "You ARE pregnant!". I went upstairs and brought him a beer as an "I'm sorry I just turned into a lunatic for 45 seconds" peace offering.  That was the moment I was pretty sure I was pregnant (this was before the test confirmed it)

Pregnancy Brain-

I was going through setting up for school when most of my symptoms started to become noticable. I spent 45 minutes one day trying to "fix my broken smartboard." I am pretty tech savy, usually I can fix most of my tech problems on my own.

 I. Was. Ticked. 

Just what I needed the day before school- a broken smartobard. As an added bonus- the tech department was overwhelmed by an overwhelming number of issues and there was no way they would get to me within the first month of school. 

A few male teachers came in to visit. I vented to them, and they did what men do, went to fix it. Well now my rage was DOUBLED. What am I, a stupid woman who needs a man to fix it? I think not! They would see...I had tried EVERYTHING.  

Within 30 seconds the art teacher solved my problem. The problem? The cleaning staff had, thoughtfully, put a clear lens cap on the projector over the summer.

Humbled.

Acne-

You know what is awesome? Teaching teenagers while YOU have acne EXPLODING all over your jaw line. Come on! Added bonus- I stopped using my acne treatment because it contained more than 2% salycidic acid. Another added bonus- this stuff HURTS! I guess there are no up-do's for this teacher for a while.

Fatigue-

One night, I brought home "In the Womb" from work. I show it to my classes each year, but this year I wanted to create a new video guide. I knew Erik would get a kick out of it, so I brought it home. I was asleep before trimester. Sitting up. Still holding my wine glass full of grape juice. (Yes, I do that. A lot.) 

Don't get me wrong, I am a lazy, lazy woman. Not just now that I am pregnant, but in life. My job is tiring. I know, so is yours, but there is something about having to be "on show" all day long, while also making connections with 130 different kids, keeping them engaged, answering their questions, helping them figure out how to resolve the problem that requires them to have something special done for them that requires my class to be interrupted (I need to go to guidance halfway through the hour. I left my textbook in my locker. I am going to be gone for the next 10 days, can I have all my work now?), and making every decision quickly even though I have to think of every possible way it can go wrong. 

I'm tired.

Thankfully, my husband read "Dude, You're Going to Be a Dad". I dont' know what is in the book, but I know that it makes him laugh out loud and it has made him even MORE aware of my needs than usual. I also know that we went to 6 used book stores trying to find it. No one gets rid of that bad boy. Now I know why. 

Rico makes sure I get to bed by 9 each night. After I go to bed, he picks up the house, even folding up the couch throws I have made my home from the time I get home until bedtime. He cooks AND cleans dinner when I am too zonked out (usually I cook and he cleans because I like to cook and HATE to clean. Hate it.) One day, he even emailed me and asked if I could make a grocery list so he could go grocery shopping for me. WHAT?! Ok!

I told my sister about this, and how I thought the book was to blame, and she pointed out that those were all very "Rico things to do anyway". So, I shouldn't give all the credit to the book, I do have a very thoughftul man. 

Body Changes-

Last year, I got in shape. I lost somewhere around 8-10 inches around my waist...and a whole cup size. Eh, you win some, you lose some (literally). 

Well- that problem has corrected itself. That's all you need to hear on that topic. 

I also feel fat. Ok, "fat" is the wrong term. Bloated? Swollen? Whatever word I choose- it isn't pretty. When I still wasn't sure if I was pregnant yet, I thought that maybe I was just gaining back all the inches I had lost because I had been SO tired that I hadn't worked out like I had been. In fact, "Coach Brown" (what I call Rico when we are in workout mode) won't let me. We went from high intensity workouts with squats, lunges, burpees, ab sessions, weights, tabadas, parking lot sprints in 90 degree weather, and interval training that usually left me soaking in sweat and panting like a dog to "pregnancy approved" workouts. 

Don't worry, I still get to have some fun. 

He has tried to tell me that I can't plank anymore....I boycott that idea. I like planking. I know it will have to go eventually but (until I have a belly that is actually getting in the way) I refuse to quit that one yet. I will, however, gladly give up those darn suicides in the parking lot without a tear in my eye.

 I can pretty much do everything else, I just don't push myself to the same point. 

Yes, I may be pregnant, but until I have a BUMP I just look like I ate too much Chipotle. I need a light on my forhead that says if I am feeling fat that day, or pregnant.  Sometimes I want Rico to notice my growing bump- so I think he would especially appreciate this light. I can't tell you how many nights he has tried to "compliment" my belly and I went into a diatribe about how fat I looked. Poor guy. One night, he walked in as I was getting ready for bed and ACTAULLY GASPED at my belly. I don't know about this whole my husband looking at my belly to check to see if it has gotten bigger thing. It gives "My eyes are up here" a WHOLE new definition.  Thankfuly, he did agree to not touch the emerging bump while I am sitting. Standing- go for it. Laying, knock yourself out. But, when I am sitting and things turn into rolls and are bulging where they didn't used to bulge- I do NOT want your hand there. "Please". And "thank you." He also used to say "No, you're pushing out, it can't be that big". Well, I can assure you that I am not "pushing it out" because I have officially lost all ability to suck in OR push out. My bump is what it is. 

I've got to GO!-

Yep, I now have the bladder of a 3 year old in an airplane. When I have to go, I have to GO... and I have to go a LOT. I knew to expect sleepless nights and going more often, but I REALLY didn't think that I would go from sleeping through every night to waking up 2 and 3 times EVERY night within two weeks! 

I know, I know, "It's just getting you ready for later!". Can we please add this to the list of things you shouldn't tell a pregnant woman? 

I SMELL-

These are more "secondary pregnancy symptoms". First, my body smells more. It isn't a mystery why- I  am TIRED. When I am tired, I sacrifice a morning shower so I can have 1/2 hour more sleep. So, every so often, I don't shower before work. Ok, every other day. Fine.

Then, on top of my natural ode-de smelly woman I add a layer of nastiness. Yes, on purpose. Every morning, and every night, I cover my body with the smell of old Halloween. You know the smell. Think back to opening your halloween candy 2 months after haloween, when all that was left were the loser pieces of candy...the tootsie rolls and random things wrapped in orange. I smell like hard, expired tootsie rolls. 

Cocoa butter. 

Every night, and every morning I lather up with it- and every night and every morning I wish I could escape from myself. I'm sure they make scent-less versions, but I am cheap, and I am going ot use the rest of the bottle I already bought. All I have to say, is that after this attack on my olfactory system, I BETTER NOT GET STRETCHMARKS. Who am I kidding, I will. 

My sister is the one that suggested the cocoa butter (and some other things) and SHE didn't get stretch marks. Yeah, well, she also never had acne when we were growing up and I did- so I'm not banking on genetics here. 

Sneezing Complications-

Now, I expected all the rest of these symptoms, but I never taught my students about SNEEZING more. Not only do I sneeze more, I can't seem to control them like I used to. I used to be able to keep my sneezes a little controlled, borderline cute. Now, there is no conrolling those bad boys.

Not only are they louder and more aggressive, if I sneeze while laying flat I get sharp pains. Ahhhh round ligament pains. Who knew?

I've Always Been So Good at Tests....

Yes, I am typically a good test taker. Here's the deal though, most tests you can study for. Our pregnancy test was more of a "pop quiz", because I hadn't planned to take it for another 3 days. Here's how test day went down:

We went on a tour of the New Birth Company today. I found out that they were covered by both of our insurances and I NEARLY cried on the phone to the insurance company. I actually DID tell the operator that I loved her. One would think that this would be a pretty good indicator that maybe I was pregnant. Unfortunately, no, I am normally this crazy.
Here's the video that first made me form this unhealthy love for a birth center:

As we were sitting in the waiting room, both feeling a little like we were playing "big kids", they instructed us to break into groups.
If you were expecting a baby, go in this group. If you were just here as a family member or simply to see what New Birth Company had to offer, go to the other group. I froze. I looked at Rico with that look in my eye that said, "Where do we go?". Clearly, subtlety is not my strong point, and the sweet representative looked at me and said, "Honey, you look confused."
The whole room turned to look at me.

"I don't know which group to go in....but I can tell you in 3 days" (the pregnancy test kit told us this was our earliest accurate test date).
Everyone chuckled, and she said something like, "Well, lets assume you are, and we'll go from there." So we toured. I ate it all up. It seemed to be exactly what I had been hoping for in a birth experience.

Mid-way through the tour it became perfectly clear to me. We were walking down the hall from seeing one of the beautiful birthing suites, past another suite with the door closed. As we were hearing about the communal kitchen space, we all heard a scream. This wasn't a shriek, it was more of a deep, guttural moan. Rico squeezed my hand tightly.

The reaction of the tour guide was what made my night. As soon as SHE heard the moan, she smiled broadly and got so excited that I thought she might jump up and down. "This is SO exciting, if any of you have labored before- you know that noise- she is crowning! We're about to have another birth day!" She then moved us on, so we could respect the privacy of the birthing woman, but I just kept thinking-

Yes! THAT is the reaction I want someone to have in that moment. Not fear. Not embarrassment. Not cringing, but EXCITEMENT.

As we left, I didn't say a word to Rico- not wanting to influence him.
"So, what did you think?"
"Alli, that place was amazing. It is exactly what you've been looking for, right?"
"You really liked it?"
"How could I not?!"
Whew.

We spent the rest of the drive home talking about our favorite parts, baby fever came on full force! Erik asked me to take a pregnancy test when we got home. I told him that I didn't want to waste a test, that we should just wait the 3 days so we wouldn't have to risk a false positive. He said he didn't care, "Let's just take one!"

Now, if you know me, you know that I love an event. I love a theme. I love secrets and surprises. I had asked Erik very early on if he wanted to be there while I took the test or if I could surprise him. He insisted on being there for "the thrill of those 2 minutes of waiting." Clearly, this was a disappointment to me, as I had all SORTS of ideas about how I wanted to tell him I was pregnant. My favorite involved re-creating the meal Aunt Becky made for Uncle Jesse on Full House- baby carrots, baby corn,  and baby back ribs. I had even begun Pinteresting baby back rib recipes! But, if he wants to be there for the big test- I can't take that away from him.

I was CONVINCED that it was going to say negative. I wasn't convinced that I wasn't pregnant. In fact, I was having all sorts of pregnancy symptoms already. I DID, however, think that it was too early to detect. I was down right cocky. "Erik, these are expensive, are you sure you want to waste $6 just to have to test again?" "YES! Let's do it!" So, we got ready for bed. I put the test up on a shelf in the medicine cabinet where neither of us would accidentally see it early. Make-up off, pj's on, teeth brushed.

If I had known what kind of information I was about to get, I certainly would have stayed cute. I HATE feeling nasty at big moments in life (again, I love an event.) 

I took the test stick to bed and put it on the side table. Erik stared at me, just waiting. I picked up the test nonchalantly.
Then I gasped. I ACTUALLY gasped. "Oh my God!"

Rico: "What? What? Are we pregnant? Are you kidding? Let me see!"
I handed him the stick. There it was, clear and easy, just as promised. I'm not sure that I've smiled that long and large since sorority recruitment days in college. My mouth ached, but I couldn't stop smiling. It didn't help that Rico was doing the same thing as he stared at the test stick.
We sat there in bed, smiling and staring. Staring and smiling. Like idiots. Our child had already made us look like idiots- boy, that was fast.
"I've got to get to work on another spreadsheet!" Rico joked...although I would put money on the fact that he did.

After about 10 minutes, he looked up at me as he cradled the test and said, "I realize this isn't how it works, but I feel like the baby is IN HERE and I have to be careful with it". We laughed and then he said, "I've got more reading to do- fast!" and pulled this book out.

"Alli, we are going to be parents. Oh my God."

It was clear that his brain was racing FAR too fast to actually get any reading done, but it was a cute effort none the less.
Somehow, we did eventually go to sleep that night. That may have been my last night of sleeping through the night...my pregnancy bladder was in action VERY quickly.

5 Years- a Perfectly "Us" Kind of Day

5 years of marriage today. Rico and I have been lucky enough to be partners in life, and love, for a very long time. We started at 14 and we've loved each other through a lot of happy moments and some really, really bad ones.

From relying on our moms and siblings to drive us to movies, football games, and in my case, to catch a ride home from school. 

Through being introduced to the extended families and spending our first Christmas together trapped in "Girl Land"

Through 16th birthdays and FINALLY getting our own cars (I think our families were just as excited as we were)

Through our first road trip to Kansas City, our future home, to see my first concert

Through High School graduation

 Through 4 years of date parties...

and football games

Through 21st Birthdays

Through College Graduation

Through a wedding full of friends, family, and some VERY memorable moments: 

The best man figures out he lost the rings AS I am walking down the aisle....eh, who cares- we get to get married

The message during the ceremony somehow involved the mention of rape, murder, incest AND robbery- it's ok as long as we get to say our vows.

The cake cutter broke mid-cut...don't care- he is my husband

The DJ doesn't have our first dance song... we'll figure it out now that I'm a Mrs.

Through a move to Kansas City as newlyweds, neither of us with jobs, just because my sister told us to.

Through year after year of Rico supporting me as a teacher: including those little extras like being my date to endless football games, basketball games, soccer games, "Mr. Bronco" competitions, talent shows, and plays. 

Through becoming first time home owners...and remodeling fools.

Through yearly wedding anniversary trips to Mexico to relax and let loose. 

Through watching our siblings and friends tie the knot. 

I would always cry. 

We would always dance. 

And, at the end of the night, we would always look back on our wedding, our marriage, and our life together with a smile and kiss.

And through ALL those date nights, events, and "exciting opportunities" that Rico did with me, just because he knew I wanted to do it. I. Love. An. Event. 

And, most recently, through being upgraded to Aunt Alli and Uncle Rico.

So, now to celebrate 5 years of marriage: 

It started at 7am, where I apparently high fived Rico while mumbling "Happy Anniversary" all while still asleep. I do these kinds of things. He went to work and I slept in.

Eventually, I woke up about an hour later to a trail of love notes that led around the house

I was FAR too sore from the torture workout he put us through the day before to squat down each time- so I army crawled, in pj's, through the house. Max, our dog, thought this was one of the most amusing things he had ever seen, so we did it together, both on all 4's. He brought mini-Max with him.

 I stopped to read each note. Some made me laugh, some made me cry- but they were a perfect anniversary good morning present. I am a very lucky woman. 

I hit up garage sales all afternoon, and met Rico for happy hour at Houlihan's to give him HIS gifts. 

These are VERY "Rico" gifts. I had been waiting MONTHS to give him the pocket hose. This man has talked about that thing EVERY time he saw it, and would even stop the DVR to watch the infomercial. To say I was excited to give it to him would be an understatement. The children's book was just something funny I found at a garage sale...for the man that CAN NOT LEAVE HIS SCABS ALONE. Gross. 

I also ordered my first official mock-tail at Houli's- it was very exciting. We had a surreal discussion about how at that exact moment, "an egg could be landing" (the Rico-friendly version of "blastocyst embedding") in my uterus. Whoa.

After the "ultimate gift" of a pocket hose (I know my man well- he practically got giddy), we went for z-men at Oklahoma Joe's for dinner. This was my choice. Rico said I could go "wherever I wanted, as fancy as you want", and while the Melting Pot was tempting (we've STILL never been there), I had to go with my gut. My gut said, "Mama wants a Z-Man". 
We finished off the night at the Lee's Summit Jamaican Jam concert outside city hall (our honeymoon was in Jamaica). The people watching was AMAZING- we were not disappointed. 

Jamaican Jam

Blizzards capped the whole night off....remember that time that I thought I was going to not eat ice cream and other bad for me things- well, I give myself a pass for special occasions. Fine, fine, count that as the first grandiose idea about pregnancy that I was wrong about. 

It was a perfectly "us" kind of day- a little odd, but full of love and fun.